Okay so I've been away from the computer for a few weeks. Anyone who know me that I'm equal parts ADD, procrastination, drive and sleepiness. It had been a busy month. I had a birthday, the Yankees won the World Series, my wife went to Hawaii. None of these are good excuses to not be writing. I also entered into three writing contests and submitted more television ideas to production companies. So why am I back here about to complain about the shit that drives me crazy? I knew that there were things bothering you people too, and I feel that if just one of you can relate to the crap surrounding my life, then you won't feel so down. Or I'm an ego maniac that likes to rant and rave.
1) Car Alarms
every car that was made after 2004 has one of those little key chain doo-hickey's that lock the doors, flash the lights and arm the alarm. This does not mean that you have to use it ALL THE TIME!! Do you really think that someone is going to go out of their way to steal your piece of shit Dodge Caravan from the side of the street in front of an Elementary School? Or that they'd like to pry the stock am\fm cassette player from the dashboard? Perhaps they're interested in digging through the layers of cheerios, crackers and spilled juice to walk away with your 22$ toddler seat. It has become such who we are(or who we think we are) but have some fuckin perspective. If you have a van that has automatic sliding side passenger doors nobody wants it. Use this analogy to get you through....If you don't want your own car, most likely nobody else does either. I feel like I wanna try and break into these peoples' car, but that would just perpetuate that sense of self they feel when they arm the fuckin alarm in the first place.
2) An open letter to my Mail Lady..
Dear Mail Lady,
I see that you drive a BMW and probably don't want to have to work like the rest of us. I also realize that everyday is the same...it's just letters, numbers and organization. And I'm fairly certain that you only deliver the mail when you want to. (how else would I only get mail two of five days last week) All that aside, my last name is Hrushowy and live at 17 Core. The family that live at 17 Carole have the last name Parbhani. I get that they are both different enough to be the same to you....BUT THEY'RE NOT!!! I'm sure you think that we probably know each other and can fix this problem ourselves. And thanks to you we do... now. (nice family)
3)Eric Hinske
Eric Hinske was a #1 draft pick of the Toronto Blue Jays. He went on to become the rookie of the year, sign a contract and eventually shipped out of town. In 2007 he played for the Boston Red Sox and won a world series. The next year he played for the Tampa Bay Devil Rays and lost in the world series. This past October Hinkse won another world series with the New York Yankees. What the Fuck? Whatever team he plays for next year, don't expect him to contribute, but they might go to the show.
4) finally H1N1
brutal name. You can't market that!! Do Muslims get the "swine flu shot"? It's hard being a parent and listening to the .001% chances of complications. You know that as a parent there isn't an amount that is comforting. Everyday we are inundated with statistics and studies, and conflicting results and arguing doctors, and crazy conspiracies. I'm not telling anyone what to do. I'm treating this like voting. Take in as much data as you can, try and filter through the bullshit the best you can, and make your own decision. You don't owe anyone else your answer. You don't have to listen to their stories, or tips, or the thing that happened to their sisters, ex-roommates, older brothers', wifes', step-daughter who thinks she got it from wearing a bathing suit instead of underwear. By the way I slept with her. I don't like hearing people trying to influence other people because of what they think...unless you're in the medical profession. I'm only qualified to offer you a pint with dinner and even that could be disputed. At the end of the day it's your decision alone, and you can live with it if you take the time to educate yourself. As long as your best interest is in the health of your child I will always back you up, whatever you decide.
5) Wii
I only have four games and yet play Super Mario 3 almost all day trying to relive those days of yore. I've learned that I was way better at managing my rage as teenager. Fuckin Mario!! Just jump up and get that fuckin mushroom!!
" B-it "(super mario term for running fast)
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
can you still be Switzerland?
I generally like to stay neutral when it comes to celebrities and their personal lives. For me it's hard to combine the fucked up way Michael Jackson acted like in private, with the brilliance of what he did musically. In fact, I believe that an artist has to separate the two just to stay sane. And it goes for people I like, and for people that I don't. Take Kanye West. This douche bag can't keep his mouth shut when he has to, but I still like his music. I probably won't go see his show, or buy another album, but I like it. Many Celebrities that have serious talent, are fuckin weirdos in real life. Can you blame them? Nothing is real. The fame, the money, the hookers. And I don't mean the celebrities that are famous, because they're famous for being celebrities. (Cast of the Hills, I'm lookin at you) I heard a quote from Kim Kardashian where she complained that it was hard sometimes when everything you do is being watched...you're on a fucking show called keeping up with the Kardashians and you're surprised. Fuckin narcissist. If you want a real life don't be the producer of the show starring yourself. Idiot.
Some, more than others, have serious difficulty with what comes with celebrity. And nowadays, there are tweets, and blogs (like this!) and TMZ, and Perez Hilton all awaiting you to slip up. Say the wrong thing and some douche that says he's a "reporter" for TMZ and he videotapes you trying to get to your car. Then they compile the vids for a half-hour show with some asshole voice-over that rips you apart. The best is they show them all sitting around a fake news room talking about how much of an asshole you are, while making condescending comments about your career. Do THEY know THEY are also on TV looking like a bunch of DickBags? Why doesn't someone follow their every move then report on...oh yeah. No one would watch. I love a good sex-tape as much as the next creepy stay at home Dad, but half the people these guys criticize aren't newsworthy(then air it anyway) And Perez is the only one getting sucker punched around here? The shit part about him getting hit is that he took some shots at the Toronto police for not reacting quicker. And he's from LA. Nobody anywhere cares about that fight. AND you, an openly gay man, called him a faggot. Maybe he was offended? I was.
It's hard to stay in the middle of these ridiculous stories when we never really hear the truth. We never know the backroom deals, and the settlements that are made. More people know that Michael Jackson settled in 93 over allegations, than the fact that Jordan Chandler recanted. He claimed his father influenced his testimony to get money. Where do we stand as a public? We have to take the skewed views of the pundits, the media, victim and the accused. From there we stand somewhere in the grey and we make an opinion. Facts can be hard to come by when a celebrity scandal is at it's height. Take the Kobe Bryant case. We know they had sex. We know the charges were dropped, because the victim refused to testify. And we know that Kobe settled with her out of court and she now has a shit load of money. He's still an amazing athlete, and last year won another NBA championship. People still buy his jersey's and they still go and see him. I doubt he still picks up random chicks without a four page affidavit, and once it's notarized he'll sleep with you. It was stupid to sleep with that girl. And it cost him reputation, respect and I assume a wheel barrel full of 100's.
This leads me to Switzerland. The land that we've all used in some argument that we don't want to be a part of. "I'm Switzerland" Meaning you abstain from any kind of decision. Its usually childish, and partly humerous. But from now on the phrase will mean a whole new thing for me. On September 26, director Roman Polanski was arrested in Zurich Switzerland for an outstanding warrant in the US dating back 1978. For years I didn't know anything about the case other than he took off after pleading guilty to having sex with a minor. Serious stuff. And sure we all feel bad that he was in Poland during WWII, and that his pregnant wife was slain by the Manson family. If anyone had a fucked up life going into this proceeding, it was him. That does not discount the horror that he bestowed on a 13 yr old girl. There are a lot of opinions about this case. Why did her actress mother allow her 13 yr old daughter to be photographed by Polanski? She'd been to their parties, she new who he was. It wasn't even the first time that a photo session went on. Is Polanksi a pedophile? Drugs, alcohol, fame, fortune and an already noted passion for younger women. Does this play a factor in his behaviour? The girl? I don't know. The one thing that we do know about this case are facts. And that's rare. Similar to the Kobe case, the girl was not going to testify, but evidence pointed out that Polanski and the girl definitely had sex. He plead guilty to a lesser charge and effectively went about fulfilling his sentence. Many of this is in the documentary Roman Polanski:wanted and desired. Fittingly on The Movie Network right now. This doc reveals some serious misuse of power in the judicial system, and all but gives the viewer every reason why Polanski left. The prosecutor of the case actually says that he's not surprised at all that he fled. The judge had orchestrated most of the moves for his own ego and career, but then began to fall back on his original deal. Both Polanki's lawyer and the DA's prosecutor agreed that the judge was acting illegally, and that Polanski had(right or wrong) fulfilled his obligation to the court. His time had been served, he had paid a shit load of money to the victim. End of story.
Yet, 32 yrs later Polanski was picked up for the outstanding warrant. I guess Switzerland decided that if they weren't going to stand up for him in 1939, why should they now. (I'm sorry about that jab) The victim has forgiven him, the old prosecutor is willing to testify on his behalf, his personal image in North America is destroyed. Polanski is 75 yrs old and is one the world's greatest director. I'm not ruling out the fact that the producer of the documentary isn't responsible for his arrest. Movie people are sick, and love Oscars. He had to watch from his home in France as he won the Oscar for best director. He buried his late wife after one of the most publicized murder cases in American history and he had a terrifying childhood in a Holocaust riddled Poland.
Personal feelings about somebody can be hard to let go of. Especially when we don't actually know them. I argued before that Michael Vick should not be shunned by anyone. Animal lover or not. He committed a crime, payed his price, did his time and has made a successful transition back into society. Isn't that what you want when someone is convicted of a crime? Isn't that the idea of punishment? Roman Polanski did what he has was told, and completed his punishment. It cost him everything. The young lady has found peace with ordeal, and truly wants it to be over. Between the money, and the time, she has found a middle ground. She had seen the conflict from the front row and no longer wants to be a part of it. If only we had a new analogy to describe her situation. Cause it sure ain't Switzerland.
Some, more than others, have serious difficulty with what comes with celebrity. And nowadays, there are tweets, and blogs (like this!) and TMZ, and Perez Hilton all awaiting you to slip up. Say the wrong thing and some douche that says he's a "reporter" for TMZ and he videotapes you trying to get to your car. Then they compile the vids for a half-hour show with some asshole voice-over that rips you apart. The best is they show them all sitting around a fake news room talking about how much of an asshole you are, while making condescending comments about your career. Do THEY know THEY are also on TV looking like a bunch of DickBags? Why doesn't someone follow their every move then report on...oh yeah. No one would watch. I love a good sex-tape as much as the next creepy stay at home Dad, but half the people these guys criticize aren't newsworthy(then air it anyway) And Perez is the only one getting sucker punched around here? The shit part about him getting hit is that he took some shots at the Toronto police for not reacting quicker. And he's from LA. Nobody anywhere cares about that fight. AND you, an openly gay man, called him a faggot. Maybe he was offended? I was.
It's hard to stay in the middle of these ridiculous stories when we never really hear the truth. We never know the backroom deals, and the settlements that are made. More people know that Michael Jackson settled in 93 over allegations, than the fact that Jordan Chandler recanted. He claimed his father influenced his testimony to get money. Where do we stand as a public? We have to take the skewed views of the pundits, the media, victim and the accused. From there we stand somewhere in the grey and we make an opinion. Facts can be hard to come by when a celebrity scandal is at it's height. Take the Kobe Bryant case. We know they had sex. We know the charges were dropped, because the victim refused to testify. And we know that Kobe settled with her out of court and she now has a shit load of money. He's still an amazing athlete, and last year won another NBA championship. People still buy his jersey's and they still go and see him. I doubt he still picks up random chicks without a four page affidavit, and once it's notarized he'll sleep with you. It was stupid to sleep with that girl. And it cost him reputation, respect and I assume a wheel barrel full of 100's.
This leads me to Switzerland. The land that we've all used in some argument that we don't want to be a part of. "I'm Switzerland" Meaning you abstain from any kind of decision. Its usually childish, and partly humerous. But from now on the phrase will mean a whole new thing for me. On September 26, director Roman Polanski was arrested in Zurich Switzerland for an outstanding warrant in the US dating back 1978. For years I didn't know anything about the case other than he took off after pleading guilty to having sex with a minor. Serious stuff. And sure we all feel bad that he was in Poland during WWII, and that his pregnant wife was slain by the Manson family. If anyone had a fucked up life going into this proceeding, it was him. That does not discount the horror that he bestowed on a 13 yr old girl. There are a lot of opinions about this case. Why did her actress mother allow her 13 yr old daughter to be photographed by Polanski? She'd been to their parties, she new who he was. It wasn't even the first time that a photo session went on. Is Polanksi a pedophile? Drugs, alcohol, fame, fortune and an already noted passion for younger women. Does this play a factor in his behaviour? The girl? I don't know. The one thing that we do know about this case are facts. And that's rare. Similar to the Kobe case, the girl was not going to testify, but evidence pointed out that Polanski and the girl definitely had sex. He plead guilty to a lesser charge and effectively went about fulfilling his sentence. Many of this is in the documentary Roman Polanski:wanted and desired. Fittingly on The Movie Network right now. This doc reveals some serious misuse of power in the judicial system, and all but gives the viewer every reason why Polanski left. The prosecutor of the case actually says that he's not surprised at all that he fled. The judge had orchestrated most of the moves for his own ego and career, but then began to fall back on his original deal. Both Polanki's lawyer and the DA's prosecutor agreed that the judge was acting illegally, and that Polanski had(right or wrong) fulfilled his obligation to the court. His time had been served, he had paid a shit load of money to the victim. End of story.
Yet, 32 yrs later Polanski was picked up for the outstanding warrant. I guess Switzerland decided that if they weren't going to stand up for him in 1939, why should they now. (I'm sorry about that jab) The victim has forgiven him, the old prosecutor is willing to testify on his behalf, his personal image in North America is destroyed. Polanski is 75 yrs old and is one the world's greatest director. I'm not ruling out the fact that the producer of the documentary isn't responsible for his arrest. Movie people are sick, and love Oscars. He had to watch from his home in France as he won the Oscar for best director. He buried his late wife after one of the most publicized murder cases in American history and he had a terrifying childhood in a Holocaust riddled Poland.
Personal feelings about somebody can be hard to let go of. Especially when we don't actually know them. I argued before that Michael Vick should not be shunned by anyone. Animal lover or not. He committed a crime, payed his price, did his time and has made a successful transition back into society. Isn't that what you want when someone is convicted of a crime? Isn't that the idea of punishment? Roman Polanski did what he has was told, and completed his punishment. It cost him everything. The young lady has found peace with ordeal, and truly wants it to be over. Between the money, and the time, she has found a middle ground. She had seen the conflict from the front row and no longer wants to be a part of it. If only we had a new analogy to describe her situation. Cause it sure ain't Switzerland.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Aww babies...
Hello Byrdie...
With so much shit in the world, people getting sick, tornadoes in Toronto, and the Blue Jays stinking it up AL east, I'm pleased with one thing....a baby. Now I know that sounds a bit girlie, and it's also not mine. Whatever...
Kevyn, Auntie Elizabeth holding Byrdie, Stacy So my friends, and one of the only other blogs I follow, have just entered into the shit storm that is parenthood, and I couldn't be happier. In my own special way, I've been awaiting this day with a cheerful grin. Most of my friends have watched me struggle with diapers, give public "time-outs, and say "no" to copious amounts of drugs, alcohol and what I assume were would-be threesomes. And now they have to look forward to jumping out of their seats to pull a piece of plastic out of the child's mouth, while screaming NO. It's exciting! At the hospital yesterday, which was also my son's birthday, I informed the happy parents that I spent the day before scrubbing the shit stains out the stroller. That some of the excess feces had seeped diligently through every open hole and was leaking into surrounding areas. The little man had exploded with crap that had reached the back of his shoulders. And at the front of the seat it had pooled up, and I needed to cup it with my hands and scoop it into a garbage bag. I ran the little dude up to the shower. The murky water needed to be swirled with my foot just to break up enough to get through the drain. Soaking wet, we both collapsed on the bed. His cute little outfit, diaper, the scrub pad, and two dish towels made there way into the garbage. I sat down just long enough for him to reach up and grab a beautiful wine glass from the rack and smash it all over the kitchen.
As I dug pieces of glass out of my foot I thought about what an amazing experience parenthood can be. The discovery, the mistakes, the shoulder-poop. It's all the time, everyday, for the rest of my life. And I wouldn't want it any other way. When that little dude does his high pitched scream, then claps, then the breathy Kelly McGillis-esque Dada, there's nothing better. At the same time the 5 year old practices kart wheels in the living room. Everything I own will eventually be ruined, my heart will be broken when she wants me to drop her off two blocks from the mall. I'll be crushed when he doesn't want to be a rock star and takes up accounting, She'll want to marry some guy that's just like me, but not the old me, the new responsible one. He'll tell me he believes marriage should only be between a man and woman, vote conservative, go to Church, and work for FOX News Canada. She starts a Catholic website that backs abstinence, and protest young drug addicts wanting abortions....
And I'll still love them with everything I have. And if the nightmare I just described actually comes true...It'll be all my fault. I'm their parent. Parenthood is great time to reevaluate your own childhood, and make it better. For me it's not about pressuring kids to be anything other than kids. It's about letting them feel all their emotions whether they're happy or sad. It's about them trusting that their parent (Me) will always be there for them, for anything, forever. Unless they end up on Intervention. The parents always look like douche bags on that show.
Fortunately I have a lot a faith in the new parents. The little beautiful baby has some great people to rely on. I used to always say you shouldn't get married until you know who you are(then stall for the rest of you life), but I feel the same way about having kids. Maybe even more so. When I see a young man gangsta limping down the street, with a nylon on his head, and pants around his thighs, I'm annoyed. When I see him pushing a stroller, I'm pissed off. Quit spending your excess money on rims, and jerseys, and a ridiculously long, fake chain and be a fucking parent. Your image should come a distant fifth next to your kids. Your attitude and how the world sees you as a pimp, shouldn't even apply if you're taking your kid to Disney World, so don't bother giving me the stare down. We're not at a club asshole, It's Chuch E Cheese!
I digress...These two new members to ranting about bad drivers, toys, and poop stories, if they know anything, it's who they are. And maybe even more important, who each other are. They have already nailed down the teamwork part of their relationship, and all parents know that is where a major strain is. They trust each, they honor each other, and they Love each other. I personally don't believe a child needs two parents, because I think I turned out okay.(ps-many people disagree!!) But it certainly helps. It also helps when they both want the same thing. Kev and Stacy have always known that they wanted each other, and now they've opened up that circle to one more. It's a hard road, it's long, and sleep seems to not be apart of it, but it's extremely rewarding. As I sit here and watch my 1yr old ram train cars into his mouth and destroy the paper I haven't read yet, and my daughter has informed me we're watching Toot and Puddle and not the soccer game. I'm filled with joy.
Congratulations guys!
Stacy- you'll be wonderful mother, you have a spoiled dog that attest to that.
Kev- You're life is over! God has exacted his revenge for every slut you banged, and girl you fucked over, by sending a girl. Not to mention that your home hierarchy has just been reshuffled.
The new world order -Baby Byrdie
Stacy (mother can feed baby from shirt!)
Cashius (the dog still needs to walked)
The Entire Kitchen
You
My advice- Buy straws, breastfeeding pillow, bottles of water, sleep in clothes that you can leave the house in, bring the stroller in the house and tie a rope\bungee on it so you can rock the baby to sleep whilst watching baseball, rely on the FAN 590 for all your sports updates...cherish every moment you have with and without that baby, even if it's doing the speed limit on the way home so you can have some me time. The car and walking the dog may be all you'll get for a while.
I love you guys
I love you guys
say Hi at http://www.thebestlifeever.com/
On a related note - Happy Birthday Alexander!! 
(Alex in Tony Soprano pose, Elizabeth, Baby Sophia, Al's torso)
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Gary Freakin' Bettman
Gary Bettman hates Canadians!
That's the bottom line. That's the only truth that I know about this douche bag. I've never met the man, nor have I ever listened to his radio show(he has a radio show?) His nervous little quirks mask what every die hard hockey fan knows....Gary bettman hates Canadians.
exhibit A - Winnipeg jets and Quebec Nordiques
In the past I didn't have much to say about these two franchises because, I didn't really care. It was a shame that the teams folded and were relocated, but it seemed that they were in dire straights at the time. Not the kind of financial disrepair as they'd become(the Jets becoming the Phoenix Coyotes, arguably the worst NHL team of all time) Now with the wheels falling off the team from the desert, Gary Bettman is doing everything but actually buying the team himself. Getting injunctions, judges, and backroom deals that will ensure that the new owner of the team will stay for a few more multimillion dollar losing years. They reportedly lost over 50 million dollars and now Bettman wants you to stick around for five more years? Then, if it's hasn't become the hottest ticket in town, with Stanley Cup parades every other year, you can move the team. Under two conditions- a)It can't be to a Canadian city where you are almost guaranteed to be successful.
b) you aren't Canadian(because you might try condition A)
The relocation of these two storied franchises from Canada, started a trend in professional sports that can never be undone. Bettman's snub of hockey history, and Canadian traditions have led to other pro sports using the same twisted logic to relocate other teams citing these examples. Bud Selig orchestrated the move of the Montreal Expos in 2004, and three years earlier the lowly Vancouver Grizzlies of the NBA moved to Memphis. American businessman were able to add clauses to ownership that stated that poor attendance would allow them the right to move. From that point it's the simple plan from the movie "Major League" don't do anything that will make the team successful and voila...there's nobody coming to see them. However, both of these situations have had serious karmic consequences. They suck! And not just a little bit...they're the worst. I hope that the Sport Gods* above never allow either of these franchises the slightest opportunity of success. They don't deserve it.
*Sport Gods- the powers that halt the personal success of any athlete that dares to put himself before the team, money before winning, or location\franchise below them. see(ref-e.g.) Eric Lindros, Steve Francis, Tracy McGrady
Exhibit B - ownership eligibility
The thing that everybody who is not an NHL owner doesn't understand is why Jim Balsillie isn't an eligible owner? Does he have too much money? And shouldn't an eligible owner be the one that CAN afford it? It doesn't make any sense. A guy shows up with enough money to make the creditors happy, pay the team and it's staff and give them a new home where they can at least have a chance to sell tickets and he's NOT eligible? I'd like to see the criteria, and see if anyone is! Not to mention that he's the Blackberry guy...the cross promotions are easy. Everyone on the board could get new phones without dealing with some dimwit at a Bell store telling you that you're upgrade is active when your kid graduates high school.
Jim Balsillie seems as much as douche as any other owner in the NHL. But is he douchier than Melnyk? Than Maple Leafs Sports and Entertainment? The dudes from Tampa Bay? How could the Molson brothers be that much better of a prospective owner than Balsillie? It appears to everyone having to listen to this crap that this is a stand off between Gary Bettmans ego and Jim Balsillie's pocketbook. Bettman can rally the troops behind him all he wants, his public opinion can only go up, but a good leader admits defeat, so buck up about the Coyotes. If the commish had put even one iota of effort into saving The Jets ,and the Nordiques perhaps we'd have better chance of seeing the Cup come home. Maybe if the criteria of ownership wasn't so many hoops then more people would hold on to their teams. So I applaud Jim Balsillie for snubbing the stupid rules, for giving the middle finger to the procedures, because they are only in place to protect Bettmans fucked up policies. And if it means that there's no owner and the teams have to play on Gretzky's backyard pond, he's going to stand by this team. If Balsillie is at all as tough as my BlackBerry he's not going to let a fall, chewing or a trip through the wash machine won't stop
him.
So what have we learned? Gary Bettman hates Canadians!! Which is weird considering that he's the commissioner of the National Hockey League. He will stand by any decision he makes whether it makes sense or not. 30 other NHL owners are so elite they don't want to be associated with one this generations most successful businessman, even if it would mean advertising, free phones and meeting U2. Teams that relocate from Canada to the US because attendance is low are bad teams, it has nothing to do with the city itself. (Are there Grizzlies in Memphis?)Gary Bettman is more concerned with some sort of integrity rather than the creditors, players, arena, and anyone else thinking they're getting a paycheck this year. And all that's waiting in the wings is a nut case with way too much disposable cash, a new arena, legions of fans, TV revenues, rivalries, free BlackBerry Storms, committed fans, and a rejuvenation of a franchise.
I wonder if Steve Jobs would have this much trouble?
That's the bottom line. That's the only truth that I know about this douche bag. I've never met the man, nor have I ever listened to his radio show(he has a radio show?) His nervous little quirks mask what every die hard hockey fan knows....Gary bettman hates Canadians.
exhibit A - Winnipeg jets and Quebec Nordiques
In the past I didn't have much to say about these two franchises because, I didn't really care. It was a shame that the teams folded and were relocated, but it seemed that they were in dire straights at the time. Not the kind of financial disrepair as they'd become(the Jets becoming the Phoenix Coyotes, arguably the worst NHL team of all time) Now with the wheels falling off the team from the desert, Gary Bettman is doing everything but actually buying the team himself. Getting injunctions, judges, and backroom deals that will ensure that the new owner of the team will stay for a few more multimillion dollar losing years. They reportedly lost over 50 million dollars and now Bettman wants you to stick around for five more years? Then, if it's hasn't become the hottest ticket in town, with Stanley Cup parades every other year, you can move the team. Under two conditions- a)It can't be to a Canadian city where you are almost guaranteed to be successful.
b) you aren't Canadian(because you might try condition A)
The relocation of these two storied franchises from Canada, started a trend in professional sports that can never be undone. Bettman's snub of hockey history, and Canadian traditions have led to other pro sports using the same twisted logic to relocate other teams citing these examples. Bud Selig orchestrated the move of the Montreal Expos in 2004, and three years earlier the lowly Vancouver Grizzlies of the NBA moved to Memphis. American businessman were able to add clauses to ownership that stated that poor attendance would allow them the right to move. From that point it's the simple plan from the movie "Major League" don't do anything that will make the team successful and voila...there's nobody coming to see them. However, both of these situations have had serious karmic consequences. They suck! And not just a little bit...they're the worst. I hope that the Sport Gods* above never allow either of these franchises the slightest opportunity of success. They don't deserve it.
*Sport Gods- the powers that halt the personal success of any athlete that dares to put himself before the team, money before winning, or location\franchise below them. see(ref-e.g.) Eric Lindros, Steve Francis, Tracy McGrady
Exhibit B - ownership eligibility
The thing that everybody who is not an NHL owner doesn't understand is why Jim Balsillie isn't an eligible owner? Does he have too much money? And shouldn't an eligible owner be the one that CAN afford it? It doesn't make any sense. A guy shows up with enough money to make the creditors happy, pay the team and it's staff and give them a new home where they can at least have a chance to sell tickets and he's NOT eligible? I'd like to see the criteria, and see if anyone is! Not to mention that he's the Blackberry guy...the cross promotions are easy. Everyone on the board could get new phones without dealing with some dimwit at a Bell store telling you that you're upgrade is active when your kid graduates high school.
Jim Balsillie seems as much as douche as any other owner in the NHL. But is he douchier than Melnyk? Than Maple Leafs Sports and Entertainment? The dudes from Tampa Bay? How could the Molson brothers be that much better of a prospective owner than Balsillie? It appears to everyone having to listen to this crap that this is a stand off between Gary Bettmans ego and Jim Balsillie's pocketbook. Bettman can rally the troops behind him all he wants, his public opinion can only go up, but a good leader admits defeat, so buck up about the Coyotes. If the commish had put even one iota of effort into saving The Jets ,and the Nordiques perhaps we'd have better chance of seeing the Cup come home. Maybe if the criteria of ownership wasn't so many hoops then more people would hold on to their teams. So I applaud Jim Balsillie for snubbing the stupid rules, for giving the middle finger to the procedures, because they are only in place to protect Bettmans fucked up policies. And if it means that there's no owner and the teams have to play on Gretzky's backyard pond, he's going to stand by this team. If Balsillie is at all as tough as my BlackBerry he's not going to let a fall, chewing or a trip through the wash machine won't stop
him.
So what have we learned? Gary Bettman hates Canadians!! Which is weird considering that he's the commissioner of the National Hockey League. He will stand by any decision he makes whether it makes sense or not. 30 other NHL owners are so elite they don't want to be associated with one this generations most successful businessman, even if it would mean advertising, free phones and meeting U2. Teams that relocate from Canada to the US because attendance is low are bad teams, it has nothing to do with the city itself. (Are there Grizzlies in Memphis?)Gary Bettman is more concerned with some sort of integrity rather than the creditors, players, arena, and anyone else thinking they're getting a paycheck this year. And all that's waiting in the wings is a nut case with way too much disposable cash, a new arena, legions of fans, TV revenues, rivalries, free BlackBerry Storms, committed fans, and a rejuvenation of a franchise.
I wonder if Steve Jobs would have this much trouble?
Friday, July 10, 2009
unbias
So many times we as a society try and uncover the truth about true equality. The true feeling or sentiment regarding all people being built the same, with the same advantages and disadvantages as everyone else. Over the past week I've been able to see a true unbias thread, and I'm sorry to say, it's not good.
Cancer
Cancer is a monster that doesn't care who you are. I doesn't care about your political background, your charity work, your kids. It doesn't follow your tax returns, or your good deeds. It doesn't matter if you are young or old, fit or sick. When it comes for you, it comes to kill you. It is relentless in it's pursuit of all of us.
Recently it has been closer than ever before. It is a step away from our family and our house. We have seen its ugly hands stretching to the loved ones, of loved ones. It breaks up families without considering who's at the heart of it. It forces you to suffer unimaginable pain just for the chance of beating it, but it doesn't guarantee that you'll win. It can be swift or it can be drawn out, but know that it's goal is the same.
Cancer isn't something that can completely be prevented. It doesn't care if you smoke, have a history, or use an old cell phone, but don't bait it. Don't think that you're better than the others that have travelled that Chemo road. You're not. You will be treated equally. It will seek you out no matter whether you deserve it or not.
I normally don't tell people what to do, just what I think, but today they mix...
I urge everyone to take the steps to ensure that you're safe from it's evil hands. Those of you that still smoke, consider quitting. It's not worth that morning bliss with your coffee. Those of us that are getting into our late thirties(especially men) Go get screened. Yes they're going to take a look up your ass, but it's probably worth it. It's just like that night with that "dancer" in Vegas. You'll be fine....deep breaths!
I used to think that I was exempt from bad things later in my life, because of the horrendous things that happened when I was younger, but not anymore. Cancer doesn't see my side of the story, and it has no plans to listen.
When my birth father appeared in my life I was nervous about what to talk about. I was more nervous hearing about his childhood, and how a man I'd never met could have similar childhood experiences. What we did share was DNA, and if he got colon cancer, then I'll have colon cancer.
He did pass me down something else though, a warning. He was also adopted and had no idea about his family history, but he has created one for me. And I'll heed that warning well. As long as the doctor's cute and will make eye contact with me afterwards, then he\she may explore my dark passage.
If Cancer doesn't care....why should I?
Cancer
Cancer is a monster that doesn't care who you are. I doesn't care about your political background, your charity work, your kids. It doesn't follow your tax returns, or your good deeds. It doesn't matter if you are young or old, fit or sick. When it comes for you, it comes to kill you. It is relentless in it's pursuit of all of us.
Recently it has been closer than ever before. It is a step away from our family and our house. We have seen its ugly hands stretching to the loved ones, of loved ones. It breaks up families without considering who's at the heart of it. It forces you to suffer unimaginable pain just for the chance of beating it, but it doesn't guarantee that you'll win. It can be swift or it can be drawn out, but know that it's goal is the same.
Cancer isn't something that can completely be prevented. It doesn't care if you smoke, have a history, or use an old cell phone, but don't bait it. Don't think that you're better than the others that have travelled that Chemo road. You're not. You will be treated equally. It will seek you out no matter whether you deserve it or not.
I normally don't tell people what to do, just what I think, but today they mix...
I urge everyone to take the steps to ensure that you're safe from it's evil hands. Those of you that still smoke, consider quitting. It's not worth that morning bliss with your coffee. Those of us that are getting into our late thirties(especially men) Go get screened. Yes they're going to take a look up your ass, but it's probably worth it. It's just like that night with that "dancer" in Vegas. You'll be fine....deep breaths!
I used to think that I was exempt from bad things later in my life, because of the horrendous things that happened when I was younger, but not anymore. Cancer doesn't see my side of the story, and it has no plans to listen.
When my birth father appeared in my life I was nervous about what to talk about. I was more nervous hearing about his childhood, and how a man I'd never met could have similar childhood experiences. What we did share was DNA, and if he got colon cancer, then I'll have colon cancer.
He did pass me down something else though, a warning. He was also adopted and had no idea about his family history, but he has created one for me. And I'll heed that warning well. As long as the doctor's cute and will make eye contact with me afterwards, then he\she may explore my dark passage.
If Cancer doesn't care....why should I?
Thursday, July 9, 2009
In my opinion...
In my Opinion...
This is a phrase that I love because I can pretty much say anything I want without worrying too much about what other people say.
Garbage Strike
I don't work for a union and never have, so I don't understand how they work or who they protect. I know that people that work in jobs that have unions want to be in them, and people who don't find them annoying. That's the category I'm in. After years of working in the minimum wage world of restaurants and bars, I don't have much sympathy for people wanting "job security and slight wage increase". While many of us put ourselves through school there were no guarantees. You still got the least amount of money legally possible, you still had to work hard for tips amidst the cheap people and there was always a chance that you could be let go with little or no recourse. After 17 years of a failed acting\writing\music career I don't have any benefits, or security. And if I were to join another restaurant with my vast experience, it would still be from the bottom of the pile. The people that slave long hours working on a patio in the summer want more money and security. So do the kitchen staff, buss boys, hostess, etc. If the restaurant and bar employees of Toronto went on strike who would you complain to? Who would fetch you a pint when you smacked your hand on the bar? Who would throw your quarter in the tip jar?
I don't doubt that the city workers feel that they deserve more money and job security. There isn't a person in the country that doesn't feel the same way, but using the city as ransom isn't winning any support from me. Their strike is affecting the people that aren't as lucky as them to have jobs, or have the security they already enjoy. Kids can't gain valuable experience from camps, and summer work. The income that young people need to gain perspective, and the value of a dollar is lost. Our recreational leagues and programs are not available for children. Don't they deserve a hard earned summer? Our beautiful parks are unkempt, some even have piles of garbage. People that rely on the tourism of our great city for a living are in jeopardy because another group of people want more. And how are the city workers going to reimburse them? How are they going to use their wage increase to help the economy? We are in a very tumultuous time and many hardworking people have already, or are soon to be out of work. I wonder how they see these people leveraging their city to gain an advantage? I'm sure that you could find plenty of ex-car manufacturers that would love to work again.
Maybe we should take a page from the auto industry. They had the most extensive union policies and they still got fired. I say we just cut these people loose and start over. We are trying to rebuild an economy. I know that there are at least 24,000 out of work people that will gladly spend summer working outdoors, cutting grass, driving the ferry over to Toronto Island, and setting off elaborate firework shows. Heck I'll even apply. The bigger picture should be the city, the children, the programs, and the tourism. These things are a renewable resource. They'll always be back, and they'll always be appreciative. If this contract was so important for the workers why didn't they strike in winter? Is standing in the snow too much for them?
PS -1) any city worker that doesn't live in Toronto should immediately be fired. You should have to smell the bags to strike.
- 2)When this is over, the streets better be clean enough to eat off. If you're going to complain about your work, when you get back it better be beautiful.
- 3) I don't live in Toronto anymore so I'm a hypocrite
This is a phrase that I love because I can pretty much say anything I want without worrying too much about what other people say.
Garbage Strike
I don't work for a union and never have, so I don't understand how they work or who they protect. I know that people that work in jobs that have unions want to be in them, and people who don't find them annoying. That's the category I'm in. After years of working in the minimum wage world of restaurants and bars, I don't have much sympathy for people wanting "job security and slight wage increase". While many of us put ourselves through school there were no guarantees. You still got the least amount of money legally possible, you still had to work hard for tips amidst the cheap people and there was always a chance that you could be let go with little or no recourse. After 17 years of a failed acting\writing\music career I don't have any benefits, or security. And if I were to join another restaurant with my vast experience, it would still be from the bottom of the pile. The people that slave long hours working on a patio in the summer want more money and security. So do the kitchen staff, buss boys, hostess, etc. If the restaurant and bar employees of Toronto went on strike who would you complain to? Who would fetch you a pint when you smacked your hand on the bar? Who would throw your quarter in the tip jar?
I don't doubt that the city workers feel that they deserve more money and job security. There isn't a person in the country that doesn't feel the same way, but using the city as ransom isn't winning any support from me. Their strike is affecting the people that aren't as lucky as them to have jobs, or have the security they already enjoy. Kids can't gain valuable experience from camps, and summer work. The income that young people need to gain perspective, and the value of a dollar is lost. Our recreational leagues and programs are not available for children. Don't they deserve a hard earned summer? Our beautiful parks are unkempt, some even have piles of garbage. People that rely on the tourism of our great city for a living are in jeopardy because another group of people want more. And how are the city workers going to reimburse them? How are they going to use their wage increase to help the economy? We are in a very tumultuous time and many hardworking people have already, or are soon to be out of work. I wonder how they see these people leveraging their city to gain an advantage? I'm sure that you could find plenty of ex-car manufacturers that would love to work again.
Maybe we should take a page from the auto industry. They had the most extensive union policies and they still got fired. I say we just cut these people loose and start over. We are trying to rebuild an economy. I know that there are at least 24,000 out of work people that will gladly spend summer working outdoors, cutting grass, driving the ferry over to Toronto Island, and setting off elaborate firework shows. Heck I'll even apply. The bigger picture should be the city, the children, the programs, and the tourism. These things are a renewable resource. They'll always be back, and they'll always be appreciative. If this contract was so important for the workers why didn't they strike in winter? Is standing in the snow too much for them?
PS -1) any city worker that doesn't live in Toronto should immediately be fired. You should have to smell the bags to strike.
- 2)When this is over, the streets better be clean enough to eat off. If you're going to complain about your work, when you get back it better be beautiful.
- 3) I don't live in Toronto anymore so I'm a hypocrite
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
On Easter weekend in 1983 my sister and I went to our Nanny and Papa's house. We spent the whole week there and lets face it....it was pretty boring. Of course in the 80's you could just go out and come back later and no one really cared. They lived close to the beach on Vancouver Island and I spent most of the time splashing around down there. The greatest thing about that time was the allowance that I had saved up and with a little bit of Easter money I could finally get what I had wanted since the past November.
Michael Jackson's Thriller!
It was the greatest moment I ever remember in music. The greatest. We went to the mall and I bolted right for the records. (they had records back then) I could smell the plastic wrap and I couldn't wait rip it open. The old lady that rang it through looked annoyed as I stared glowingly at the cover. And there was mike in that amazing suit. Leaning back all casual. I couldn't wait until we could get back to the house. I ogled the album the entire ride back and planted myself on the floor in front of the gigantic record player. I lifted the top, that was the size of car hood, and tore through the protective plastic. I put the record down, placed the needle and went from start to finish in one seating. It had the words inside the sleeve, so I had that out and I followed along every word. I tried to remember to the best of my ability the moves that I saw on commercials, or when they talked about him on the news. We didn't have cable so all I could go on was what I remembered. I danced around the floor, I sang as loud as I could. They made me put on these huge headphones so that the rest of the family didn't have to hear this popular music. For me....it was everything. Michael was the greatest thing I'd ever laid eyes on. The way he moved, the feelings that he gave to each song.
I'd always been a music freak. My Mom would remind me later that I was a big Long John Baldry fan when I was 3. That's what got me into playing the piano at 5. MJ changed everything for me after that. My parents would have people over and they would mention Michael and my Mother would put on Billie Jean and I would do the entire video step for step. Earlier that year is when Michael was on the Motown 25th show and did the moonwalk for the first time. What really drew me in was the way people reacted in the audience. As a "centre of attention" guy this really intrigued me. People were freaking out. It was incredible. Everywhere you went in the early 80's was guy with one glove, or a sequence jacket, or pants with zippers all over them. And everyone else had a mullet!
In 1984 the Jackson 5 went on the Victory tour and much to many of our surprise they announced they would play three shows in Vancouver. I seriously freaked out and I saved every penny I could to see them. The night came and my stepfather (the worst person in the f*ckin world) took me downtown to B.C. Place. We parked his shit brown station wagon and headed to the show. I didn't know how concerts worked, or scalpers, or whatever. I could feel the excitement, the energy. Just thinking about the fact that Michael was in the building that I was next too was enough to send me flying. In my pocket I had 110$ and I was prepared to spend it all! As long as I could get a t-shirt. But f*ckface Earl didn't. (I'm trying not to swear in honor of MJ) What kind of a selfish assh*le drives and hour with a grinning child only to withhold the biggest thing that has ever happened to them? He didn't care that I could afford to go in, he didn't want to spend the money to sit with me. The WORST person ever! I'll tell you more about him later, but this was another brick in the shithouse childhood he gave me. And I'll never forget it. I'll never forget hearing the noise of the stadium from outside as the Jackson 5 took the stage. That feeling deep in my gut as we pulled out of the parking lot and the prospect of this being a joke disappeared. He cursed me as I bawled the whole way home. I didn't care. Everytime he raised his hand at me after that it was hardly as painful as wealthy dentist deciding that he didn't want to go in so that a child may fulfill a dream.
So much that MJ did was impressive to me. His words about the world from a guy who'd never been apart of the real one. His effort and professionalism was unprecedented. Not to mention that his numerous musical works. He changed the world of music, videos, live shows and inspired almost everyone in music today. One way or another he was special. A friend once said to me, "think what you want about Michael Jackson, if I told you he was at the corner store, you'd run as fast as could to be there. "
You know that man that was on the cover of magazines, dangling his kids out of windows and had mutilipe noses? That wasn't the Michael Jackson I bawled my eyes about today. The one that choked up Usher, the one whos' daughter wanted the world to know that she lost her father. It was this guy...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GzNiZ4CjSsc
When a door shuts... 1) my 5yr old daughter's favorite song is Black and White( she can dance almost the entire video)
2) the day MJ died my friends had a beautiful baby boy! Congrats Kelly and Sandy...I can't wait to see him dance
Michael Jackson's Thriller!
It was the greatest moment I ever remember in music. The greatest. We went to the mall and I bolted right for the records. (they had records back then) I could smell the plastic wrap and I couldn't wait rip it open. The old lady that rang it through looked annoyed as I stared glowingly at the cover. And there was mike in that amazing suit. Leaning back all casual. I couldn't wait until we could get back to the house. I ogled the album the entire ride back and planted myself on the floor in front of the gigantic record player. I lifted the top, that was the size of car hood, and tore through the protective plastic. I put the record down, placed the needle and went from start to finish in one seating. It had the words inside the sleeve, so I had that out and I followed along every word. I tried to remember to the best of my ability the moves that I saw on commercials, or when they talked about him on the news. We didn't have cable so all I could go on was what I remembered. I danced around the floor, I sang as loud as I could. They made me put on these huge headphones so that the rest of the family didn't have to hear this popular music. For me....it was everything. Michael was the greatest thing I'd ever laid eyes on. The way he moved, the feelings that he gave to each song.
I'd always been a music freak. My Mom would remind me later that I was a big Long John Baldry fan when I was 3. That's what got me into playing the piano at 5. MJ changed everything for me after that. My parents would have people over and they would mention Michael and my Mother would put on Billie Jean and I would do the entire video step for step. Earlier that year is when Michael was on the Motown 25th show and did the moonwalk for the first time. What really drew me in was the way people reacted in the audience. As a "centre of attention" guy this really intrigued me. People were freaking out. It was incredible. Everywhere you went in the early 80's was guy with one glove, or a sequence jacket, or pants with zippers all over them. And everyone else had a mullet!
In 1984 the Jackson 5 went on the Victory tour and much to many of our surprise they announced they would play three shows in Vancouver. I seriously freaked out and I saved every penny I could to see them. The night came and my stepfather (the worst person in the f*ckin world) took me downtown to B.C. Place. We parked his shit brown station wagon and headed to the show. I didn't know how concerts worked, or scalpers, or whatever. I could feel the excitement, the energy. Just thinking about the fact that Michael was in the building that I was next too was enough to send me flying. In my pocket I had 110$ and I was prepared to spend it all! As long as I could get a t-shirt. But f*ckface Earl didn't. (I'm trying not to swear in honor of MJ) What kind of a selfish assh*le drives and hour with a grinning child only to withhold the biggest thing that has ever happened to them? He didn't care that I could afford to go in, he didn't want to spend the money to sit with me. The WORST person ever! I'll tell you more about him later, but this was another brick in the shithouse childhood he gave me. And I'll never forget it. I'll never forget hearing the noise of the stadium from outside as the Jackson 5 took the stage. That feeling deep in my gut as we pulled out of the parking lot and the prospect of this being a joke disappeared. He cursed me as I bawled the whole way home. I didn't care. Everytime he raised his hand at me after that it was hardly as painful as wealthy dentist deciding that he didn't want to go in so that a child may fulfill a dream.
So much that MJ did was impressive to me. His words about the world from a guy who'd never been apart of the real one. His effort and professionalism was unprecedented. Not to mention that his numerous musical works. He changed the world of music, videos, live shows and inspired almost everyone in music today. One way or another he was special. A friend once said to me, "think what you want about Michael Jackson, if I told you he was at the corner store, you'd run as fast as could to be there. "
You know that man that was on the cover of magazines, dangling his kids out of windows and had mutilipe noses? That wasn't the Michael Jackson I bawled my eyes about today. The one that choked up Usher, the one whos' daughter wanted the world to know that she lost her father. It was this guy...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GzNiZ4CjSsc
When a door shuts... 1) my 5yr old daughter's favorite song is Black and White( she can dance almost the entire video)
2) the day MJ died my friends had a beautiful baby boy! Congrats Kelly and Sandy...I can't wait to see him dance
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
and of course.....Hitler
The other day I feel asleep watching the Daily Show on CTV and woke up to the morning show Canada AM. This is a morning show that I don't usually watch unless I know someone that's going to be on it. So it was rare to have it on. I tried my best to stay sleeping even though I could hear the baby crawling across the floor downstairs, but I awoke to some inflammatory language.
Hitler
Mr Allan Lichtman was a guest on the show and the question was posed to him, "Is Obama doing enough about the turmoil in Iran" Which I don't understand. I know that Obama is the second coming of Christ, but I thought his job was to save America, then go from country to country healing the wounded and making water into wine. Mr Licthman opined that America should be doing more to help the unrest in the country, and then.....here it comes....he said that this situation was much like Hitler in 1939.
Are you fucking kidding me? Hitler? Can we make a rule that you have to be in the process of killing millions of innocent people before you're allowed to evoke the name Hitler.
For the record, there has never been another Hitler. Ever! All of these people that we think are shitheads, can be on the same scale, but they'll never be another #1.
Mr.Lichtman may have forgotten that Hitler was a real bad dude. And even though he's a political historian, he may have also forgot that in 1939, the US wasn't even involved with WWII! The fact that he would use this time in history as a jumping off point when it wasn't even a jumping off point for his own country then. And lets face it, the last time they involved themselves in the government of a country in the middle east...oh yeah, that's still going on. Stop going up to the global buffet and trying to get more when you haven't even finished what on your own plate!!!!
People just use the name Hitler whenever there's someone real bad, but he was truly the devil! He thought that he could polarize a region, instill his values and beliefs on unsuspecting countries. He killed civilians and combatants based on their religion. Wait a minute, what happened in Iraq again? Not even Saddam was in Hitler's league, and he killed thousands. The Taliban Killed thousands.
Hitler killed Millions. Look at your bank account. Add four more zeros and you might be in the neighbourhood of the amount of people that died. Millions
If Allan Lichtman, FOX and many of the other American pundits are looking for a comparison about the trouble in Iran then they should take the facts.
It was an election in which the candidate that was favoured to win, didn't. They had a recount that seemed pointless because the people that did the recounting appear to be in the pocket of the guy they say won. The winner is brash, and crass and routinely says inappropriate things in public. He wants to stand alone in the world, thinks that it's "us" versus "them", and has no interest in the global community and their opinions. His ego drives him and the people that disagree with him are imprisoned, sanctioned, or labelled a trader. People are rising up against the tyranny, but are trying to be muzzled by the government
If only there was a a country in the past ten years with a similar scenario, then we could learn from the mistakes there. Instead of trying to right the wrong from sixty years ago.
There will never be another a Hitler, we know that, but we should ensure that there isn't another supreme leader of any country that doesn't allow it's people to have a voice, protest policy, or disagree without the fear of anti-patriotism. The people in Iran who are standing up for themselves are no different than the people that protested the War in Iraq.
Allan Lichtman is a smart man, and he worked on the voting irregularities in Florida in 2000, but if he and the rest of the pundits are wondering why Obama isn't doing more, or not enough, Hitler shouldn't be the stick they use to poke him. If they truly want Obama to step into a 1939, Hitler type situation, then maybe they should stop off in Dar fur. They don't even get a chance to vote...and the casualties are nearing the millions. It's not as sexy, they don't have oil, or nuclear technology, but they have millions of women being raped, children being killed and a country being destroyed. Lets save the "holier than thou" shit until we actually go to another country to help them.
Hitler
Mr Allan Lichtman was a guest on the show and the question was posed to him, "Is Obama doing enough about the turmoil in Iran" Which I don't understand. I know that Obama is the second coming of Christ, but I thought his job was to save America, then go from country to country healing the wounded and making water into wine. Mr Licthman opined that America should be doing more to help the unrest in the country, and then.....here it comes....he said that this situation was much like Hitler in 1939.
Are you fucking kidding me? Hitler? Can we make a rule that you have to be in the process of killing millions of innocent people before you're allowed to evoke the name Hitler.
For the record, there has never been another Hitler. Ever! All of these people that we think are shitheads, can be on the same scale, but they'll never be another #1.
Mr.Lichtman may have forgotten that Hitler was a real bad dude. And even though he's a political historian, he may have also forgot that in 1939, the US wasn't even involved with WWII! The fact that he would use this time in history as a jumping off point when it wasn't even a jumping off point for his own country then. And lets face it, the last time they involved themselves in the government of a country in the middle east...oh yeah, that's still going on. Stop going up to the global buffet and trying to get more when you haven't even finished what on your own plate!!!!
People just use the name Hitler whenever there's someone real bad, but he was truly the devil! He thought that he could polarize a region, instill his values and beliefs on unsuspecting countries. He killed civilians and combatants based on their religion. Wait a minute, what happened in Iraq again? Not even Saddam was in Hitler's league, and he killed thousands. The Taliban Killed thousands.
Hitler killed Millions. Look at your bank account. Add four more zeros and you might be in the neighbourhood of the amount of people that died. Millions
If Allan Lichtman, FOX and many of the other American pundits are looking for a comparison about the trouble in Iran then they should take the facts.
It was an election in which the candidate that was favoured to win, didn't. They had a recount that seemed pointless because the people that did the recounting appear to be in the pocket of the guy they say won. The winner is brash, and crass and routinely says inappropriate things in public. He wants to stand alone in the world, thinks that it's "us" versus "them", and has no interest in the global community and their opinions. His ego drives him and the people that disagree with him are imprisoned, sanctioned, or labelled a trader. People are rising up against the tyranny, but are trying to be muzzled by the government
If only there was a a country in the past ten years with a similar scenario, then we could learn from the mistakes there. Instead of trying to right the wrong from sixty years ago.
There will never be another a Hitler, we know that, but we should ensure that there isn't another supreme leader of any country that doesn't allow it's people to have a voice, protest policy, or disagree without the fear of anti-patriotism. The people in Iran who are standing up for themselves are no different than the people that protested the War in Iraq.
Allan Lichtman is a smart man, and he worked on the voting irregularities in Florida in 2000, but if he and the rest of the pundits are wondering why Obama isn't doing more, or not enough, Hitler shouldn't be the stick they use to poke him. If they truly want Obama to step into a 1939, Hitler type situation, then maybe they should stop off in Dar fur. They don't even get a chance to vote...and the casualties are nearing the millions. It's not as sexy, they don't have oil, or nuclear technology, but they have millions of women being raped, children being killed and a country being destroyed. Lets save the "holier than thou" shit until we actually go to another country to help them.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Do they still make parts for my car?
Okay, I admit that I don't know much about owning, running or profiting from a car company.
and I've been very nice to avoid the subject for so long......But not today!!
Originally I blamed the ridiculously ugly PT Cruiser for the fall of Chrysler. (and I kinda still believe that!) But now I hear that GM may be out of business? WTF?
Listen, I don't want anyone to lose their job(s). I want everyone to make money, spend money, enroll their kids in Dance School. But I can't help but feel as though the Big Car companies, and Big Oil have knocked us over the drums long enough. We've had no choice. We watched gas prices skyrocket for what seemed no reason. Then we watched Petro-Canada representatives talk about taxes, and production cost....then record profit after record profit. I remember one day I put 20$ in the tank, forgot my wallet, had to drive home to get it and pay. By the time I was on my way back home again the Fucking light came on and I needed more gas. So as these giants crumble I'm having a hard time finding sympathy for the upper management types, and CEO's. The people that work at the plants.....okay I feel for them.However, they shouldn't be giving us(the consumers) the gears, nor should they be asking for a helping hand. Thousands upon thousands of people have lost their jobs from much smaller companies that cannot ask for a bailout. They also didn't have hundreds of employees that have the distinct job of keeping the business afloat. Maybe if their girlfriends over at OPEC hadn't made us pay outrageous prices for fuel the past six years some of us may been able to buy a new vehicle. The "Mom and Pop" store may go under in this new economy, and I guarantee they saw it coming, so why now are these big US car companies so fucking surprised? Its the PT cruiser.....you were asking for it!
On that subject, I also wonder why every commercial I see has some high priced celebrity endorsement. Perhaps long before you were trying to figure out how to dump stock, before filing for chapter 11, you should have cut down your marketing budget. I think Howie Long and Denis Leary are doing okay for money. Maybe give that simple task to an actor that needs money. Like me asshole! There's nothing worse than watching some mutli-million dollar commercial about a product that is about to be obsolete. Some genius took the bailout money and solidified that America's Next Top Model will have sponsorship.....nice going . Not to mention that when a car ad mocks another company(see: Chevy commercial making fun of Honda) shouldn't they have some introspection about their own product and troubled future? The line goes something like, "there's one thing that Honda does have that we don't...a lawn mower." Yeah and what appears to be better management, longevity, production and the integrity to not kick another company suffering from a global economic crisis. The line should have been,"Honda does have something that we don't....a bailout package squandered on upper management and the foresight to create fuel efficient vehicle long before we had to ask for help." Now that's a company I would buy from. Just for being honest.
By the way, I'm not surprised that the Pontiac division has been halted. I have an Aztec and it's easily the second ugliest car on the road. (fucking PT cruiser.....and they made a convertible...like you want anyone to see you in it.)
and I've been very nice to avoid the subject for so long......But not today!!
Originally I blamed the ridiculously ugly PT Cruiser for the fall of Chrysler. (and I kinda still believe that!) But now I hear that GM may be out of business? WTF?
Listen, I don't want anyone to lose their job(s). I want everyone to make money, spend money, enroll their kids in Dance School. But I can't help but feel as though the Big Car companies, and Big Oil have knocked us over the drums long enough. We've had no choice. We watched gas prices skyrocket for what seemed no reason. Then we watched Petro-Canada representatives talk about taxes, and production cost....then record profit after record profit. I remember one day I put 20$ in the tank, forgot my wallet, had to drive home to get it and pay. By the time I was on my way back home again the Fucking light came on and I needed more gas. So as these giants crumble I'm having a hard time finding sympathy for the upper management types, and CEO's. The people that work at the plants.....okay I feel for them.However, they shouldn't be giving us(the consumers) the gears, nor should they be asking for a helping hand. Thousands upon thousands of people have lost their jobs from much smaller companies that cannot ask for a bailout. They also didn't have hundreds of employees that have the distinct job of keeping the business afloat. Maybe if their girlfriends over at OPEC hadn't made us pay outrageous prices for fuel the past six years some of us may been able to buy a new vehicle. The "Mom and Pop" store may go under in this new economy, and I guarantee they saw it coming, so why now are these big US car companies so fucking surprised? Its the PT cruiser.....you were asking for it!
On that subject, I also wonder why every commercial I see has some high priced celebrity endorsement. Perhaps long before you were trying to figure out how to dump stock, before filing for chapter 11, you should have cut down your marketing budget. I think Howie Long and Denis Leary are doing okay for money. Maybe give that simple task to an actor that needs money. Like me asshole! There's nothing worse than watching some mutli-million dollar commercial about a product that is about to be obsolete. Some genius took the bailout money and solidified that America's Next Top Model will have sponsorship.....nice going . Not to mention that when a car ad mocks another company(see: Chevy commercial making fun of Honda) shouldn't they have some introspection about their own product and troubled future? The line goes something like, "there's one thing that Honda does have that we don't...a lawn mower." Yeah and what appears to be better management, longevity, production and the integrity to not kick another company suffering from a global economic crisis. The line should have been,"Honda does have something that we don't....a bailout package squandered on upper management and the foresight to create fuel efficient vehicle long before we had to ask for help." Now that's a company I would buy from. Just for being honest.
By the way, I'm not surprised that the Pontiac division has been halted. I have an Aztec and it's easily the second ugliest car on the road. (fucking PT cruiser.....and they made a convertible...like you want anyone to see you in it.)
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Stacy King....we need you!
Last night I was watching Bones and switched methodically back and forth to watch 3 baseball games and two basketball games. It's kinda freaked me out that over the years I've watched less and less Basketball. And I couldn't figure it out until now.
Stacy King.
Back in the day there was a fire that brewed beneath ball players. They got mad, they filled the lane. The Pistons played team defence that usually resulted in someone on the floor. Xavier McDaniel would dig his shoulder into you if you tried a move on him. Thems were the days.
Now the rhetoric has changed. Now the players say things like this is MY house, not OUR house. They speak in the third person, and refer to the things they did.....not the team.....not everyone....just ME!!
It's become a total joke. Players strive to be rich, not successful. They leave teams to join other teams to be famous not to win. It's embarassing. Sure the scrums at the end of every whistle during the hockey play-offs are a little much, but at least they show competitiveness. Basketball has become the only professional sport in which you can give up so easy. You can lose with little care or remorse. Even Gilbert Arenas said that if the have losing season they could get a better draft pick. No other athelete would have the balls to say such a thing. But it's the NBA! They only care about themselves.
Of course there are exceptions to the rule and one is certainly Dwane Wade. Hurt and beat up, Flash gives it all even when he doesn't have it all. So last night after getting thumped, both on the scoreboard and literally, Atlanta's Josh Smith got free on a break away and tried to go between the legs for a dunk. A blatant showboat move in a game that was already won. A kick in the balls to a team on the ropes of ellimination. So how did The Miami Heat respond you ask? A flagrant foul? Maybe one of those NBA slap fests? How about the sucker punch, then start running backwards move?
NO! nothing. They just sat there. They had two minutes to let Atlanta know that when they get back to Miami they were going to get a fight. But they didn't. They just sat there. This series is over. No fireworks, no nothing. The worst part is, unlike hockey or even soccer, when you win a series in Basketball you applaud yourself, not the other team. You scream ADIDAS slogans in to the air. You call yourslef the underdog even though you're the number one team, and you give yourself a nickname. Is it any wonder I don't watch anymore? Why should I care about sport that loves itself so much, there's no room for anyone else.
So why Stacy King? In 1992 game 4, Bulls versus Cavs, Danny Ferry swung two punches at Michael Jordan and was ejected. In game 5 with less than two minutes left, Stacy King came into the game for the Bulls and laid a forearm to Ferry's forehead. The crowd cheered, King was ejected and Jordan smiled. I'm sure he paid the fine as well. It was his job! It was Charles Oakley's job before him. Tradition!
Don't just count your money on the sidelines....compete!
"I'll always remember this as the night that Michael Jordan and I combined for 70 points." Said after Michael Jordan scored a career high 69 points and Stacey King scored 1 point against the Cavaliers
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
How I saved the world
So we have a Crisis....or two.
A bird got sick, gave it a pig, and passed it on to us. I guess the spider didn't know how to say "back off, I gotta cough" in Spanish. Don't get me wrong I think it's terrible. I don't want to see kids dying from the flu.
Then we got this economic downturn. Or whatever CNN has labeled it this week. All I know is the best English Football team has has the logo of a failing company on it. Hey, it's just like the Toronto Maple Leafs! Except the teachers pension is doing fine. If the teachers pension owns part of the team, does that mean that my kids kindergarten teacher has better chance of getting tickets then me? If she could afford them, of course.
Miss America contestant hates gays...
Simon Cowell likes someone...
I did my taxes...
The world is fucked up place. More fucked up then normal. Now I've come up with a solution that will propel Canada to the forefront of the world by doing something we are already good at. Getting high!
Think about it.....okay exhale, then think about it. All of the things we need are right here in the grow operation across the street. These freedom fighters have recognized that in order for the dollar to gain, for gas prices to go down, and all of us to chill the fuck out...is POT.
Anyone that knows me, knows that I don't smoke pot(anymore) It's personal choice, nothing political. In fact still enjoy the smell at the McDonald's drive thru at 3:00am. I'm an ego-maniac and I didn't enjoy getting stupid. That's not a euphemism, I was literally stupid. I couldn't work the simplest things.....my disc man, my VCR, my commodore 64....holy shit I haven't been high in a long time.
And there was the fact that I was eating two cold Pop Tarts while I was waiting for the other two Pop Tarts to pop. it was a vicious cycle. Mustard sandwiches, frozen corn dogs, and gigantic box of slim jims. One time we ordered 35 cheeseburgers and had to take the top bun off the last ten to finish....but we did finish.
Those glory days of stupidity, gluttony and sense of self got me thinking.
What do we need right now?
Jobs, confidence, support for local business, and job creation!!
Weed is our answer.
We could legalize marijuana!!
Now your dealer doesn't have to be some jean jacket wearing asshole, it can be the nice people who used to work for AIG. We could increase sales at Canadian owned companies like Lays with bags and bags of chips, and Maynard's Fuzzy Peach and Wine Gums , and pockets full smarties. I could start a soft taco delivery service after 12. We would feel entitled in the international world. If we were sober enough to care. We could have free trade for Swiss Chocolate.
Our whole infrastructure would be overhauled. Think how advertisers could finally market right to you and your dumbass needs. Like anyone actually thinks that Kinder Surprise is for kids. They could finally explain why the most watched HD channel in Canada is Discovery. No condescending prick at revenue Canada would ask why you didn't file for five years, it would be obvious....you forgot. Wing sales would be through the roof, and we could make another three Matrix movies with that dude from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure.
Tourism would skyrocket. You could have a full day of just driving between Calgary and Banff and freaking out at the mountains. Hundreds of thousands of people just staring at Niagara Falls, eating Beaver Tails and screaming in that haunted house.
I could get a job just talking, and ranting and people would tell me that this is the kind of shit that should be on TV.
And then it is...
Dentist's offices' would be overbooked.
Membership to gyms would triple....and people would go as long as there was a place to fire a bong.
Football players wouldn't get busted.
Wouldn't it be great! See you can tell that I don't smoke anymore, I wouldn't have made through this.....
Daily Show just started
...My kids still has Easter candy
... what was I saying
...Whatever.
A bird got sick, gave it a pig, and passed it on to us. I guess the spider didn't know how to say "back off, I gotta cough" in Spanish. Don't get me wrong I think it's terrible. I don't want to see kids dying from the flu.
Then we got this economic downturn. Or whatever CNN has labeled it this week. All I know is the best English Football team has has the logo of a failing company on it. Hey, it's just like the Toronto Maple Leafs! Except the teachers pension is doing fine. If the teachers pension owns part of the team, does that mean that my kids kindergarten teacher has better chance of getting tickets then me? If she could afford them, of course.
Miss America contestant hates gays...
Simon Cowell likes someone...
I did my taxes...
The world is fucked up place. More fucked up then normal. Now I've come up with a solution that will propel Canada to the forefront of the world by doing something we are already good at. Getting high!
Think about it.....okay exhale, then think about it. All of the things we need are right here in the grow operation across the street. These freedom fighters have recognized that in order for the dollar to gain, for gas prices to go down, and all of us to chill the fuck out...is POT.
Anyone that knows me, knows that I don't smoke pot(anymore) It's personal choice, nothing political. In fact still enjoy the smell at the McDonald's drive thru at 3:00am. I'm an ego-maniac and I didn't enjoy getting stupid. That's not a euphemism, I was literally stupid. I couldn't work the simplest things.....my disc man, my VCR, my commodore 64....holy shit I haven't been high in a long time.
And there was the fact that I was eating two cold Pop Tarts while I was waiting for the other two Pop Tarts to pop. it was a vicious cycle. Mustard sandwiches, frozen corn dogs, and gigantic box of slim jims. One time we ordered 35 cheeseburgers and had to take the top bun off the last ten to finish....but we did finish.
Those glory days of stupidity, gluttony and sense of self got me thinking.
What do we need right now?
Jobs, confidence, support for local business, and job creation!!
Weed is our answer.
We could legalize marijuana!!
Now your dealer doesn't have to be some jean jacket wearing asshole, it can be the nice people who used to work for AIG. We could increase sales at Canadian owned companies like Lays with bags and bags of chips, and Maynard's Fuzzy Peach and Wine Gums , and pockets full smarties. I could start a soft taco delivery service after 12. We would feel entitled in the international world. If we were sober enough to care. We could have free trade for Swiss Chocolate.
Our whole infrastructure would be overhauled. Think how advertisers could finally market right to you and your dumbass needs. Like anyone actually thinks that Kinder Surprise is for kids. They could finally explain why the most watched HD channel in Canada is Discovery. No condescending prick at revenue Canada would ask why you didn't file for five years, it would be obvious....you forgot. Wing sales would be through the roof, and we could make another three Matrix movies with that dude from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure.
Tourism would skyrocket. You could have a full day of just driving between Calgary and Banff and freaking out at the mountains. Hundreds of thousands of people just staring at Niagara Falls, eating Beaver Tails and screaming in that haunted house.
I could get a job just talking, and ranting and people would tell me that this is the kind of shit that should be on TV.
And then it is...
Dentist's offices' would be overbooked.
Membership to gyms would triple....and people would go as long as there was a place to fire a bong.
Football players wouldn't get busted.
Wouldn't it be great! See you can tell that I don't smoke anymore, I wouldn't have made through this.....
Daily Show just started
...My kids still has Easter candy
... what was I saying
...Whatever.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Lets all be Canadian( book propsal)
Lets all be Canadian....
I often wonder about the world and worry about the people that stand front and center evoking the sense, belief, and principals of another great person for their own selfish purpose.
#1)Sean Hannity
I have never been a fan of organized religion, but I understand the faith. I believe in a higher being and I believe that my mother looks down upon me. Sometimes grimacing, but looking nonetheless. I admit that I never watch a entire Sean Hannity program, and truthfully I don't really care about his politics, or agenda when it comes to getting more viewers. (remember it is a TV show and first and foremost he needs ratings to continue.) I also don't really have a huge problem with FOX NEWS, because I don't watch it. It's there for a certain demographic and I'm not one of them. For the longest time I hated Bill O'Reilly, but I realized that he's just a douche bag trying to stay atop the cable news opinion ratings. He's a walking oxymoron and when you realize that, he ain't so bad. I also like that he will go on shows that he knows don't agree with him, and audience members don't like him. It shows some balls. Sean Hannity does something that no man without the last name Christ should do. He drags the Bible, and Christianity through the mud in order to perpetuate his own motives. And I thought there was something in there about "false idols"? This blasphemous ex-contractor continually makes comment like "America is the greatest country God ever gave man" As if God took a pencil and drew up the countries long before pilgrims landed. (where someone already lived!! another blog) I think the people that should be really angry are the people of America that deem themselves religious. Don't you realize that a man on a nationally televised program is interrupting your scripture to sell tickets. He claims to love his country and his God, but has ranked the two of them in the same sentence, America coming first. By doing so it not only makes him an extremist of Christianity, but a butcher of their constitution.
#2) Glenn Beck
This guy didn't seem too evil until he went over to FOX NEWS and got a debriefing on how to scare the shit out viewers so they watch your show every night. He started this 912 project.
"The 9-12 Project is designed to bring us all back to the place we were on September 12, 2001." Wow....moving. Way to hit this topic at the height of it's importance....8 years later. Now I wonder why this comical pundit all of a sudden feels like his country is slipping away? What has changed over the past eight years......oh right. The president! So just now he's noticed the country is going in a shit direction, well you know who's fault that it is....Barack. The guy that just got here. You don't go back to the restaurant and complain about the meal you had eight years ago because they're now under new management. Unless you're a douche bag? I guess because he's one of the few that haven't lost his job, in fact he got a new better one, he can rally the downtrodden around a subject that has lost meaning at FOX. They have raped and pillaged everything possible from 911. Even Giuliani couldn't rouse the people using it as his only platform running for office. The only thing Glenn Beck is interested in is Glenn Beck. Stephen Colbert said it best, "The 9-12 project is not for families directly affected by 9/11, just people building their careers on it."
#3) George Stroumboulopoulos
George is a national treasure and I'm not just saying this because he's Facebook friend. He really is. At the end of his career he will most likely be the greatest Canadian broadcaster of all time. I believe that. His show, The Hour, is the only program that you will ever see, where a humble host will ask the question that you'd love to see the guest answer. You feel like you're over at someones house and the Australian Prime Minister happens to be there. What makes it special, is the humility. George sits with every guest, not in awe or disdain, but with humility that eases them. He truly wants to know.....whether you want to answer or not, he'll ask. He also seems to take public opinion with a grain of salt, and will allow the guest to be as forthcoming as they want. It's non-political, it's non-partisan, it's Classically Canadian. We pride ourselves on hearing what the other has to say, then judging for ourselves. We are open to others and their opinions, even when we disagree. We believe in seeing the person first, and their beliefs, politics, race, and creeds second. We respect other countries and their laws, whether we advocate them or not. We laugh at ourselves, long before people make us the butt of a joke.
Sure I haven't met either Glenn Beck or Sean Hannity and I've gone off on one of my tangents about them, completely contradicting my statements about the merit of each person. My TV show isn't on air.....and theirs are. Their shows are billed as "opinion", which gives people the right to opine about the subjects they cover. Trust me, I'm not going to say NO if either invites me on. I hope that they are people behind those TV masks. And I hope to learn something about who they really are. If I did, I would hope I have some humility, comedy, and reasonable sense of fairness.
Basically....Canadian
I often wonder about the world and worry about the people that stand front and center evoking the sense, belief, and principals of another great person for their own selfish purpose.
#1)Sean Hannity
I have never been a fan of organized religion, but I understand the faith. I believe in a higher being and I believe that my mother looks down upon me. Sometimes grimacing, but looking nonetheless. I admit that I never watch a entire Sean Hannity program, and truthfully I don't really care about his politics, or agenda when it comes to getting more viewers. (remember it is a TV show and first and foremost he needs ratings to continue.) I also don't really have a huge problem with FOX NEWS, because I don't watch it. It's there for a certain demographic and I'm not one of them. For the longest time I hated Bill O'Reilly, but I realized that he's just a douche bag trying to stay atop the cable news opinion ratings. He's a walking oxymoron and when you realize that, he ain't so bad. I also like that he will go on shows that he knows don't agree with him, and audience members don't like him. It shows some balls. Sean Hannity does something that no man without the last name Christ should do. He drags the Bible, and Christianity through the mud in order to perpetuate his own motives. And I thought there was something in there about "false idols"? This blasphemous ex-contractor continually makes comment like "America is the greatest country God ever gave man" As if God took a pencil and drew up the countries long before pilgrims landed. (where someone already lived!! another blog) I think the people that should be really angry are the people of America that deem themselves religious. Don't you realize that a man on a nationally televised program is interrupting your scripture to sell tickets. He claims to love his country and his God, but has ranked the two of them in the same sentence, America coming first. By doing so it not only makes him an extremist of Christianity, but a butcher of their constitution.
#2) Glenn Beck
This guy didn't seem too evil until he went over to FOX NEWS and got a debriefing on how to scare the shit out viewers so they watch your show every night. He started this 912 project.
"The 9-12 Project is designed to bring us all back to the place we were on September 12, 2001." Wow....moving. Way to hit this topic at the height of it's importance....8 years later. Now I wonder why this comical pundit all of a sudden feels like his country is slipping away? What has changed over the past eight years......oh right. The president! So just now he's noticed the country is going in a shit direction, well you know who's fault that it is....Barack. The guy that just got here. You don't go back to the restaurant and complain about the meal you had eight years ago because they're now under new management. Unless you're a douche bag? I guess because he's one of the few that haven't lost his job, in fact he got a new better one, he can rally the downtrodden around a subject that has lost meaning at FOX. They have raped and pillaged everything possible from 911. Even Giuliani couldn't rouse the people using it as his only platform running for office. The only thing Glenn Beck is interested in is Glenn Beck. Stephen Colbert said it best, "The 9-12 project is not for families directly affected by 9/11, just people building their careers on it."
#3) George Stroumboulopoulos
George is a national treasure and I'm not just saying this because he's Facebook friend. He really is. At the end of his career he will most likely be the greatest Canadian broadcaster of all time. I believe that. His show, The Hour, is the only program that you will ever see, where a humble host will ask the question that you'd love to see the guest answer. You feel like you're over at someones house and the Australian Prime Minister happens to be there. What makes it special, is the humility. George sits with every guest, not in awe or disdain, but with humility that eases them. He truly wants to know.....whether you want to answer or not, he'll ask. He also seems to take public opinion with a grain of salt, and will allow the guest to be as forthcoming as they want. It's non-political, it's non-partisan, it's Classically Canadian. We pride ourselves on hearing what the other has to say, then judging for ourselves. We are open to others and their opinions, even when we disagree. We believe in seeing the person first, and their beliefs, politics, race, and creeds second. We respect other countries and their laws, whether we advocate them or not. We laugh at ourselves, long before people make us the butt of a joke.
Sure I haven't met either Glenn Beck or Sean Hannity and I've gone off on one of my tangents about them, completely contradicting my statements about the merit of each person. My TV show isn't on air.....and theirs are. Their shows are billed as "opinion", which gives people the right to opine about the subjects they cover. Trust me, I'm not going to say NO if either invites me on. I hope that they are people behind those TV masks. And I hope to learn something about who they really are. If I did, I would hope I have some humility, comedy, and reasonable sense of fairness.
Basically....Canadian
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
going green
I'd like to think that I'm doing my part when it comes to making the world a better place. I'm probably not, but I'd like to think that I am. I don't follow the truck and make sure that they are actually recycling, but I trust that they are. I try to buy local products, organic foods, and when I remember to bring those environmentally safe bags. I usually forget, but whatever.
When I shop for groceries I go on this criteria:
#1- local(or national) there's an economic crisis. We gotta look after those around us. Also the local stuff is usually fresher, better quality and in season.
#2-Organic- I want that good-for-you, no pesticides crap too. It last longer....it's natural. Awesome.
#3- environmentally friendly- I have kids, so I don't want that lemony Mr.Clean paint stripper that we used in the eighties. I just got my sense of smell back.
My problem with some of these products is that it seems they don't want the same things. My organic lettuce comes in a plastic container that my fuck-stick garbage man says isn't recyclable. What?
Why is plastic container not being picked up? And why is an organic product packaged in a non-recyclable container?
Which brings me to my real problem.....
If you don't like being a garbage man, or recycling truck guy, or working the empties counter at the Beer Store, then quit!! I don't give a shit what you do, but don't take out your petty frustrations with your shitty job on my shitty life! I have enough to worry about without some fucker in a jump suit coming to my door to tell me that he won't pick up my blue bin because it got knocked over. Or the wind blew some of the paper out, so rather than pick it up(it's right beside the bin) he leaves it on my lawn. Then when I get home three hours later it melted into the grass because of a rain storm. And for some reason my two blue bins are scattered across the driveway. FUCK YOU!!
I don't like my job either. But I'm mad at myself, not the assholes that order a drink that I don't want to make! ( Not true I hate those fuckers too) But I still make it......sometimes. Regardless, I work in a bar where handing out insults is par for the course. Just pick up my garbage please. I don't need your "holier than thou" attitude.
There are so many of us that don't like what we do but he have to do it for whatever reason. I afraid that the global narcissism is at an all time high. Everyone wants you to know what THEY are thinking, or feeling, with little care on how it comes across. How does that guy not realize that when he rings my door, to tell me that he's not going to pick up my trash, that I have the every right to knock him the fuck out. But he thinks I care about his job, his feelings, his code of ethics when he does his job. Well I don't.
I have a sign on my door that says "please don't ring doorbell, baby sleeping" So when this hunk of shit, so wrapped up in his sense of self, pushes that little button, so that he can update me on his feelings towards his job....and my kid wakes up, why should I care? In that two seconds it takes to read that sign, he could've realized that there was another person on the other side of that door.
That just makes me angry.....and you wouldn't like me when I'm angry
When I shop for groceries I go on this criteria:
#1- local(or national) there's an economic crisis. We gotta look after those around us. Also the local stuff is usually fresher, better quality and in season.
#2-Organic- I want that good-for-you, no pesticides crap too. It last longer....it's natural. Awesome.
#3- environmentally friendly- I have kids, so I don't want that lemony Mr.Clean paint stripper that we used in the eighties. I just got my sense of smell back.
My problem with some of these products is that it seems they don't want the same things. My organic lettuce comes in a plastic container that my fuck-stick garbage man says isn't recyclable. What?
Why is plastic container not being picked up? And why is an organic product packaged in a non-recyclable container?
Which brings me to my real problem.....
If you don't like being a garbage man, or recycling truck guy, or working the empties counter at the Beer Store, then quit!! I don't give a shit what you do, but don't take out your petty frustrations with your shitty job on my shitty life! I have enough to worry about without some fucker in a jump suit coming to my door to tell me that he won't pick up my blue bin because it got knocked over. Or the wind blew some of the paper out, so rather than pick it up(it's right beside the bin) he leaves it on my lawn. Then when I get home three hours later it melted into the grass because of a rain storm. And for some reason my two blue bins are scattered across the driveway. FUCK YOU!!
I don't like my job either. But I'm mad at myself, not the assholes that order a drink that I don't want to make! ( Not true I hate those fuckers too) But I still make it......sometimes. Regardless, I work in a bar where handing out insults is par for the course. Just pick up my garbage please. I don't need your "holier than thou" attitude.
There are so many of us that don't like what we do but he have to do it for whatever reason. I afraid that the global narcissism is at an all time high. Everyone wants you to know what THEY are thinking, or feeling, with little care on how it comes across. How does that guy not realize that when he rings my door, to tell me that he's not going to pick up my trash, that I have the every right to knock him the fuck out. But he thinks I care about his job, his feelings, his code of ethics when he does his job. Well I don't.
I have a sign on my door that says "please don't ring doorbell, baby sleeping" So when this hunk of shit, so wrapped up in his sense of self, pushes that little button, so that he can update me on his feelings towards his job....and my kid wakes up, why should I care? In that two seconds it takes to read that sign, he could've realized that there was another person on the other side of that door.
That just makes me angry.....and you wouldn't like me when I'm angry
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
The Junos
Music....
some people like it the way they like their bacon, Canadian.
I don't care either way, and I'm certainly in no position to criticize the award show for Canadian music. The Junos are our thing. I usually don't pay attention to them cause they're are held somewhere outside of Toronto, and as a suburbanite I pretend that I don't know where Halifax is. However this year it's in Vangroovy so I shall comment.
Now, everyone knows that they're not the Grammy's, or the AMA's, or even the MMVA( I don't know what any of those things mean) but they are ours. They have tradition, and are respected and have a shit load of big name winners like Snow, and Luba, and Mitsou.....okay Mitsou never won anything, but anyone that remembers Bye Bye Mon Cowboy knows she was robbed. As Velveeta as some of the ceremonies have been , and as big as some of the artist have been, they've always been seen by the mainstream as fairly Vanilla.
Recently Matthew Good of the Matthew Good Band mocked the awards. He went on to make fun of MuchMusic's annual award show as well. When I first read about it, it was on my home page for the news and I skipped passed the article. I mean, it's Matthew Good. Who cares. He's got desire to attend, he thinks it's pointless. He went on to say "We played the MuchMusic awards (in 2000). It's full of crap. It's tripe, you know? I see it in some ways as forming a sort of false connectivity with people, because you have to present that sense of falseness that's very prevalent in music."
Someone in the public eye has to present a sense of falseness? Really? And you brought this up in an interview? One that you knew would be published in a major paper? What the Fuck, Matthew? If you hate the face time part of the music industry, then stop putting your fucking face on the cover of your albums. Is it you don't like the fact that the Junos are all about the big selling, marketable bands because you weren't one? If you don't want "false connectivity" then quit pretending that you're better than the people that do care. That do show up. I haven't heard your name since you popped to many pills in kingston, but your names in the paper now.
And what's that.....you have a new album coming out?
Two things
#1) you said about your writing, "There's so much for me to write about - society has become so absolutely ridiculous" guess what fucker, you're a part of that society. Some people even think that music helps shape it.....thanks
#2) If you want to be a burned out pot head, crusty old has-been that lives in parents basement, named his last album Avalanche with no respect for the many people that have died in B.C.,and now has bi-polar disorder.....don't name your new album Vancouver. For me it shows false sense of connectivity with the people of Vancouver
one last thing....do you really think that there's an award ceremony in any other country or market that isn't a load of shit?
Thanks for insight
some people like it the way they like their bacon, Canadian.
I don't care either way, and I'm certainly in no position to criticize the award show for Canadian music. The Junos are our thing. I usually don't pay attention to them cause they're are held somewhere outside of Toronto, and as a suburbanite I pretend that I don't know where Halifax is. However this year it's in Vangroovy so I shall comment.
Now, everyone knows that they're not the Grammy's, or the AMA's, or even the MMVA( I don't know what any of those things mean) but they are ours. They have tradition, and are respected and have a shit load of big name winners like Snow, and Luba, and Mitsou.....okay Mitsou never won anything, but anyone that remembers Bye Bye Mon Cowboy knows she was robbed. As Velveeta as some of the ceremonies have been , and as big as some of the artist have been, they've always been seen by the mainstream as fairly Vanilla.
Recently Matthew Good of the Matthew Good Band mocked the awards. He went on to make fun of MuchMusic's annual award show as well. When I first read about it, it was on my home page for the news and I skipped passed the article. I mean, it's Matthew Good. Who cares. He's got desire to attend, he thinks it's pointless. He went on to say "We played the MuchMusic awards (in 2000). It's full of crap. It's tripe, you know? I see it in some ways as forming a sort of false connectivity with people, because you have to present that sense of falseness that's very prevalent in music."
Someone in the public eye has to present a sense of falseness? Really? And you brought this up in an interview? One that you knew would be published in a major paper? What the Fuck, Matthew? If you hate the face time part of the music industry, then stop putting your fucking face on the cover of your albums. Is it you don't like the fact that the Junos are all about the big selling, marketable bands because you weren't one? If you don't want "false connectivity" then quit pretending that you're better than the people that do care. That do show up. I haven't heard your name since you popped to many pills in kingston, but your names in the paper now.
And what's that.....you have a new album coming out?
Two things
#1) you said about your writing, "There's so much for me to write about - society has become so absolutely ridiculous" guess what fucker, you're a part of that society. Some people even think that music helps shape it.....thanks
#2) If you want to be a burned out pot head, crusty old has-been that lives in parents basement, named his last album Avalanche with no respect for the many people that have died in B.C.,and now has bi-polar disorder.....don't name your new album Vancouver. For me it shows false sense of connectivity with the people of Vancouver
one last thing....do you really think that there's an award ceremony in any other country or market that isn't a load of shit?
Thanks for insight
Monday, March 23, 2009
aw....the Comb-Over
Okay
I admit, it's been a long time since I had a good rant. I've been busy.......doing something?
whatever
Anyway, today whilst reading something before I scanned the Internet porn, I became pissed off.
Years ago I had promised a friend of mine that I would write a book about how Americans and Canadians got along. How we're similar, and how we've had fundamental beliefs in ourselves that were drastically different. Now I have bitched about our relationship before, but that's what makes it so strong. I'm straying...... I said that America was like the worlds' comb-over. They point, criticize, mock and laugh at other cultures and countries, but fail to see the faults in their own. Much like how people with comb-overs wander the streets like they have a full head of hair, but everyone sees that stringy, slicked over elongated pieces from above their ears. There's nothing wrong with losing your hair, there is something wrong with pretending you're not.
I also wanted to make a documentary about how Americans like to beat on Canada to make themselves feel better. Sure maybe we have a full head of hair, but they're a copyright lawyer so they still believe they're better than us. To personalize it for you, think about the douche bag that is a "junior executive" that's trying to convince you(or himself) that his life is way better than yours, and yet he's at a crowded bar talking to you.....the bartender. All popular TV shows take pot shots at Canada. We don't care because it's probably written by a Canadian. We allow them this luxury because we have a great sense of humor and we lend them our comedians, film crews and cities to be the great landscape that is America on the screen. I mean you didn't actually think those beautiful mountains in BrokeBack Mountain were in America, did you? Those good ol boys aren't going to let a movie about two people being in love filmed there. Unless you think that Right to bare arms means a big gay hug.(I'd like to think that)
Which brings me to the reason my hiatus was thwarted en route to grotesque pornography.
FOX NEWS....again. If you haven't heard Greg Gutfeld and his well established program the Red Eye was a no holds barred Canada bashing. And everyone that was up at 3:30am to watch this drivel was....well no one watched it. I mean it aired at 3:30 am on St. Patricks Day. Gimme a break. Anyway, this piece of shit Gutfeld decided to trash this great land of ours, which is our job. And I can't help wonder that if the guy that got fired from Stuff magazine and Maxim UK has a show on FOX, why the fuck don't I? He's not as funny as me.....I'm Canadian!!
The air-quote comedian air-quote, that was on the show had four dates in Edmonton at a comedy club just miles from the base there, but his safety can't be guaranteed so they've cancelled the show. Finally he's involved in something I can laugh at.
Gutfeld and satirical counterparts took many pot shots at our vast country and the way we do things. They poked fun at how a decorated General said that our military could use a well deserved break in policing Afghanistan. Gutfeld said, "The Canadian military wants to take a breather to do some yoga, paint landscapes, run on the beach in gorgeous white Capri pants."
It's cute that he thinks Canada is some new aged Caribbean island. I'm sure any US soldier would take the break as well. He also suggested that the US invade Canada, because " they have no military" We certainly don't have the size of forces that they do, but we also don't have as many people. And people dying. Four days after his brilliant comments four Canadians died in Afghanistan, a joint effort project, and our proud citizens lined up to honor those fallen along the Highway of Heroes. Fox news doesn't report their military casualties, or show the heroes returning. They can, we won't make fun of them. Our stickers say support our troops with two flags on them.
Gutfeld is douche bag there is no doubt. He's one of the fucks that thinks he's funny, he surrounds himself with people he thinks are funny and then hits primetime for drunks that are coming down from coke binges. I don't even know what the big stink is, we had to wait five days to find out who this prick is, and I'm not setting my alarm to watch his shitty show. FOX NEWS shouldn't be ashamed, they must not like him either. If FOX NEWS thinks YOU'RE a douche bag....Yikes. Even if I have to wake up and feed the little one, I'll still chose porn over this guy.
If any Canadian show, comical or trying to be satirical (I'm looking at you This hour has 22 minutes) ever made comments about the American military, or mocked them for trying to save it's patriots, or questioned their foreign policy....scratch that last one, every 24 hour news station would be calling for their heads.
FOX NEWS, we're not so different you and I, but you should try asking yourself WWAD (what would America do?) before you speak.
Greg Gutfeld....soak it up asshole. People are actually referring to you as a "jokester". This is the most press you are ever going to get. And not to complete my metaphor, but do you have PLUGS?
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