further proof the world is fu%#ed up...

Okay so I've been away from the computer for a few weeks. Anyone who know me that I'm equal parts ADD, procrastination, drive and sleepiness. It had been a busy month. I had a birthday, the Yankees won the World Series, my wife went to Hawaii. None of these are good excuses to not be writing. I also entered into three writing contests and submitted more television ideas to production companies. So why am I back here about to complain about the shit that drives me crazy? I knew that there were things bothering you people too, and I feel that if just one of you can relate to the crap surrounding my life, then you won't feel so down. Or I'm an ego maniac that likes to rant and rave.

1) Car Alarms

every car that was made after 2004 has one of those little key chain doo-hickey's that lock the doors, flash the lights and arm the alarm. This does not mean that you have to use it ALL THE TIME!! Do you really think that someone is going to go out of their way to steal your piece of shit Dodge Caravan from the side of the street in front of an Elementary School? Or that they'd like to pry the stock am\fm cassette player from the dashboard? Perhaps they're interested in digging through the layers of cheerios, crackers and spilled juice to walk away with your 22$ toddler seat. It has become such who we are(or who we think we are) but have some fuckin perspective. If you have a van that has automatic sliding side passenger doors nobody wants it. Use this analogy to get you through....If you don't want your own car, most likely nobody else does either. I feel like I wanna try and break into these peoples' car, but that would just perpetuate that sense of self they feel when they arm the fuckin alarm in the first place.

2) An open letter to my Mail Lady..

Dear Mail Lady,

I see that you drive a BMW and probably don't want to have to work like the rest of us. I also realize that everyday is the same...it's just letters, numbers and organization. And I'm fairly certain that you only deliver the mail when you want to. (how else would I only get mail two of five days last week) All that aside, my last name is Hrushowy and live at 17 Core. The family that live at 17 Carole have the last name Parbhani. I get that they are both different enough to be the same to you....BUT THEY'RE NOT!!! I'm sure you think that we probably know each other and can fix this problem ourselves. And thanks to you we do... now. (nice family)

3)Eric Hinske

Eric Hinske was a #1 draft pick of the Toronto Blue Jays. He went on to become the rookie of the year, sign a contract and eventually shipped out of town. In 2007 he played for the Boston Red Sox and won a world series. The next year he played for the Tampa Bay Devil Rays and lost in the world series. This past October Hinkse won another world series with the New York Yankees. What the Fuck? Whatever team he plays for next year, don't expect him to contribute, but they might go to the show.

4) finally H1N1

brutal name. You can't market that!! Do Muslims get the "swine flu shot"? It's hard being a parent and listening to the .001% chances of complications. You know that as a parent there isn't an amount that is comforting. Everyday we are inundated with statistics and studies, and conflicting results and arguing doctors, and crazy conspiracies. I'm not telling anyone what to do. I'm treating this like voting. Take in as much data as you can, try and filter through the bullshit the best you can, and make your own decision. You don't owe anyone else your answer. You don't have to listen to their stories, or tips, or the thing that happened to their sisters, ex-roommates, older brothers', wifes', step-daughter who thinks she got it from wearing a bathing suit instead of underwear. By the way I slept with her. I don't like hearing people trying to influence other people because of what they think...unless you're in the medical profession. I'm only qualified to offer you a pint with dinner and even that could be disputed. At the end of the day it's your decision alone, and you can live with it if you take the time to educate yourself. As long as your best interest is in the health of your child I will always back you up, whatever you decide.

5) Wii

I only have four games and yet play Super Mario 3 almost all day trying to relive those days of yore. I've learned that I was way better at managing my rage as teenager. Fuckin Mario!! Just jump up and get that fuckin mushroom!!

" B-it "(super mario term for running fast)